If you know me, you know that I am the definition of an extrovert. But let me back up a second, if you don’t know an extrovert is “an outgoing, overtly expressive person”, but there is also an introvert which is a “shy, reticent person.” – that is off Google. Do you know which one you are?
I am the true meaning of an extrovert, I love to meet new people, I thrive in chaotic social situations, I love to talk, go on adventures, connect with humans and would rather spend most of my day with my friends or family than be alone. If I don’t have human interaction for awhile, I shut down and get super super quiet. So, you can imagine that this quarantine for me has been extremely tough. I call my mom first thing in the morning and then immediately hang up and call my sister right after. I then call them throughout the day about a hundred times – that’s how well I am coping. However, I am also a massive homebody. I love my space, I love to be at home in my comfort zone and if I am gone for too long, I like to take some time to recover and just stay put without any plans. I am an extreme extrovert that gets drained and overwhelmed if she is not at home for too long (it’s weird, I know). Does anyone else get like this or know what I mean?
When I was a kid being outgoing was easy for me, I wanted to be everyone’s friend. As soon as I hit middle school and high school, I shut down. I was not as outgoing, definitely didn’t mind having a very small group of friends or even just one or two. I moved high schools three different times which seems crazy, I know. I switched freshman year to sophomore because everyone at that school just wasn’t really a friend to me and I needed to go somewhere I felt like I could thrive in. Then I moved to Orange County my junior year and struggled really hard with that transition. It was definitely tougher to make friends here because in a small town like this one they all grew up together so everyone knew everyone, and nobody knew the new girl. I guess I got comfortable in being alone at that point and it really became about quality of friends rather than quantity. It took me graduating, doing college online for four years and starting my first real job to find my confidence and my extrovert side again. It came with age and I feel like that part of me will continuously adapt or grow and I love that.
Confidence to me is being comfortable in myself, knowing that my sense of humor, my sassy attitude, and my wit is definitely strong and it is all from my momma (Hi Mom!). It is knowing that I will NEVER have perfect skin, no matter how freakin’ hard I cleanse, moisturize, and hydrate – it will never fully love me and that’s okay (sometimes, it really bothers me though haha). It is knowing that every single person on social media either all looks the same or extremely different and I can not and will not compare myself. It comes with being happy with yourself and who you are and loving yourself enough to stick up for yourself, not be in that toxic relationship you swore was healthy to everyone else but yourself. It is finding your voice when nobody else will do it for you, and it is allowing yourself to grow, adapt, and change and knowing that is the most beautiful thing a human can do. I love human connections and I think that it is the one thing that can’t be taken from us, unless we take it from ourselves. I think that I have changed in the last few years fifty times and I love that I am able to mentally spread my roots farther and allow myself more sunlight to grow.
You might be saying well that sounds easier said than done, it is! Believe me, this has been years of wanting to change so many things about myself to now coming to love each freckle because my mom would always tell they were angel kisses. It won’t happen right away and hell it won’t be easy but it will be worth it.
So here are the five things I want you to ask yourself every day, write it down in a journal and see how those answers change over the course of six months to a year.
- What is one thing you like about your appearance?
- What is one thing you love about your personality?
- What is something you can do today to positively impact someone or something else? (because self confident people are positive influences on society!)
- What is one thing that made you happy today?
- What is one thing you said to yourself that was negative today and how can you fix that tomorrow?
Let me know if you answer these questions and how it works for you! Confidence doesn’t mean you have to be an extrovert and being an extrovert doesn’t mean you have to love being away from your home and comfort zone. Self confidence and self love are the biggest keys to thinking positive thoughts and loving yourself. Stop saying the word hate in your daily vocabulary if you’re allowing it to come back on what you hate about yourself.
You are you and that is your power.
Sending you all the love and light this week. Love yourself.
Xo,
HMadz
hmadz.com 