Well to say it’s been a minute would be the understatement of 2020 and there were plenty of those already.
I took some time off because I had LOADS of life things happening. For those of you who don’t know, I moved across the country in August.. my first big girl thing I think I have ever done. I packed up my apartment in California, packed our car to the absolute brim (literally no room for people so that was good), and grabbed my dog and we took off. We took a bit of time – I think it was about a week to get from point A to B. I went through many states I had never seen before andddd then there were some that I don’t really need to ever see twice haha. This move was purely because of the way the world kind of happened. I switched careers in the middle of all of this and have been keeping my head down since. I guess I needed to breathe a bit before I got back in the swing of things, because this wasn’t a small thing for me – and I wanted to make sure my mental health and stress levels went down before I tried to make sense of it all. I also feel that you need to not be present on social media because society expects it and “it’s weird” when you are quiet on there because it’s life – no life is happening in front of you and it’s okay to not need to share every bit of that.. ya know?
I am a creature of habit, change is tough for me sometimes but I actually didn’t realize how badly I needed it?! I am the girl that goes to the same restaurant every week because I know I like it – so moving across country where you don’t necessarily know anything was very intimidating to me. Let me tell you having a list of new places to go to and experience is RAD and I love to travel so this was that, magnified. I feel that it was supposed to happen and when 2020 played out the way it did, it was supposed to happen right then. I am so grateful and thankful I had a place to land for a bit and I have the most supportive family and friends who I didn’t know I had the data to FaceTime every moment of every day.. RIP to my cellular data plan. When I say, I missed my people that might actually be the biggest understatement of the year. If all else went to sh** this year, I had my people and that is what got me through it all. I think when you go through your seasons of change and confusion you know where you stand with a lot of people and thats the clarity we really need all the time but moments of stress and distance can make that pretty clear, pretty fast. Put the energy into people who put the energy into you. That’s something that I live by and always will.
I don’t know where I was taking this little blog of mine but I just wanted to pop in and say hello, hi, I am here even though it may have seemed like I disappeared. I think we all kind of hit this disappearance act this year in some way – we needed to in a weird way.
I think the one thing I want to say to you all is, take the jump, take the leap, if it’s meant to be the universe will let you know that. I can’t tell you how many days I would just wait until I got a sign of what I was supposed to be doing and you might not get the direct answer but you will certainly get the direction you need to head in. I think that is the most beautiful thing about this weird world, it takes it shape when it needs to and sometimes things are supposed to crumble around you so you can rebuild them again. If nature can burn down only to grow back again, then so can we and that is something that really scared me for a long time.. can I rebuild myself? Well ya know what, I am and I always will. Because it isn’t where you are, it’s who you are with and I can say my cup is forever runnithing over.
Sending you all hugs from my new humble of bode.
With love,
H Madz
hmadz.com 